Uncovering The Hidden World of Motivation

You don’t know people’s motivation. You’re not a mind reader. Sometimes you don’t understand your own inner drives.

Motivations are invisible. You see an action and speculate about motive. But people do what they do for unseen reasons. Sometimes people actively hide their motivations.

It’s dangerous to imagine you understand people’s inner drives. You might assume destructive motivation when people are sincere, for example.

Uncovering hidden motivations:

#1. Notice patterns.

1. Are they kind to higher ups and rude to lower downs?
2. What do they repeatedly do under pressure?
3. How do they react to success and failure?
4. What do they do when they have nothing to gain?

#2. Observe energy.

1. When do they speak loudly?
2. When do they light up?
3. Reflect their energy back. Say, “I noticed you light up when…” Sit back and listen.
4. What do they brag about?

#3. Ask questions.

1. What are you proud of?
2. What energizes you about this work?
3. What does success look like?
4. Ask the second question. First, “What do you love doing?” Second, “What do you love about that?”

#4. Listen to frustration.

1. Anger might indicate a blocked drive. What would they do if they didn’t feel restricted?
2. What frustrates them more? People or processes.
3. What recurring complaints do you hear?

Why you care:

The danger of misunderstanding people is misjudging generous actions. You might wrongly assume a person is using kindness to manipulate you. In that case, you think their kindness is manipulation.

Understanding is essential to connecting.  Unseen drivers explain actions.

Discerning drivers helps leaders predict behaviors.

Personal insights open a channel of influence. You speak to their concerns using language that resonates with them.

What is the impact of misjudging people’s inner motivation?

Gallup’s research on engagement.